The Body Eccentric

I went shopping for clothes yesterday - BIG MISTAKE.  I would love to be one of those people who always have the perfect look, never a hair out of place, but I have to face reality -  I'm just not.
I wanted to try and get a 'dressy' outfit for a party we have coming up soon. I always tend to drag the same pair of pants and top out of the cupboard for these sort of occasions, but I was really geared up for a new set of clothes.
That was until about the second set of stuff I tried on. I'll be honest, I could afford to lose a few kilos, but my standard size is a 12, so you would think I could find something that would look semi decent.

Image from www.weheartit.com

NOTHING I put on fit properly - they were either too tight in one place and saggy in others, the dress I tried on made me look like a patterned potato sack, the latest trend in over sized tops and skinny jeans make me look like a hobbit trying to fit into an elves robe.
Where are Trinny and Susannah when I need them? Could they save this fashion tragic? Unfortunatley the fairy godmothers of chic were not on hand, and I left empty handed and feeling like more of a frump than ever.

Come on girls, help me out!

So my friends will be subjected to the same ensemble as always, the beautiful people will be rocking it effortlessly and my general hatred of  clothes shopping remains intact. How do you avoid the pitfalls of fashion?